A Most Madgical Glee.

***UPDATE***

There will be another Madonna episode this fall! Rejoice!

Last night's Glee was the episode we had all looked forward to since, well, since they first announced they were doing it.

Madonna.

I can't think of any way to organize my thoughts (as evident in my previous Glee post), so let's just start by running through the musical numbers.

1) "Ray of Light," featuring cheerleaders dancing on stilts. Whaaa? It started off cool, then became totally awkward with the stilt action. Not the best way to start off such a highly anticipated episode.

2) "Express Yourself" was better, and I think we actually got to hear Santana sing solo for a whole lyric! Tina C. didn't get any solos though. Quinn looked like a young Madonna.

3) "Borderline/Open Your Heart." Playful and sweet. Loved it. I generally like the Rachel/Finn numbers, and this was no exception.

4) The "Vogue" video. Still terrific the 26th time around (I'm kind of obsessed). And now, with context! I'd wondered why only Kurt and Mercedes were in it. And why there were those knowing looks between them.

5) "Like A Virgin." My favorite of the night! The song played along to a video montage of Finn, Rachel and Emma about to do the deed for the very first time with Santana, Jessie and Will, respectively. The singing? Peppy and innocent. The video montage? Part sexy and part chaste. Not easy to do, but Glee pulled it off. This one was a winner from start to finish.

6) Kurt and Mercedes' "4 Minutes," with accompaniment from a marching band and featuring about a thousand McKinley High cheerleaders. Great number. Not my favorite Madonna song, but the Glee kids gave it an urgency and energy not found in the original (sorry, Madge).

...and here is where I turned off the TV. It was 10PM, a commercial came on, and I thought the show was over.

Lesson for life (or for as long as Glee's on TV, anyway): NEVER TURN OFF THE TV UNTIL THE CREDITS ROLL. Actually, for the purposes of this blog, this lesson can be shortened to NEVER TURN OFF THE TV.

So what did I miss? ONLY THE BIGGEST NUMBER OF THE WHOLE SHOW:

7) "Like A Prayer." Upon checking the song list online to write this post, I could not remember this song from last night, so I went and found it on YouTube. The number started off the way most Glee numbers start off, with Lea Michele standing alone under a spotlight. Then the rest of the cast joins her, and the curtains rise, and (goosebumps here) a whole friggin' choir appears and everyone is raising their arms to the heavens and Mercedes is belting it out and I think I have seen God.

Dear American Idol: Kill off two judges. Right now. I don't care which two. Four judges = four (let's face it) extraneous opinions = Glee gets pushed back = I miss the ending = I want to hurt somebody. But I just spent the last hour watching/listening to/writing about Glee, so I'm feeling giddy and smiley and I will not be able to hurt a fly for the next six hours and 47 minutes. After that, I'm coming for you, Randy Dawg.

Other random notes: I loved the reappearance of Lauren Potter, who has Down syndrome and plays Becky the cheerleader. Big ups to Becky! Also, I am tired of all the Will hair jokes. Every other line uttered by Sue in Will's presence was about his coif. Enough already.

Best quotes of the episode:

"Madonna. Simply saying the word aloud makes me feel powerful...even in voiceover." -Sue

"Mercedes is black and I'm gay. We make culture." -Kurt

"When I pulled my hamstring, I went to a misogynist." -Brittany

Proud Glee Keep On Burning

Before I get into last night's Glee, I have just one question:

Artie and...Tina C.?

I was so flabbergasted by that development. I mean yes, I'm glad two of the more underused cast members got their time in the sun. And that they were given a storyline that did not revolve around glee club. (I'm still waiting for Mike Chang's plot. Can we give him something to do other than look hot while dancing?) But Artie and Tina C.--it was just so bizarre. Like the Glee producers threw it in just for the heck of it. When it comes to tentative, awkward teen romances, I like a slow roast. What viewers got, however, was a frozen turkey thrown into a bathtub full of hot water to thaw it right before Thanksgiving dinner.*

Weird romance angle aside, I adored last night's episode, particularly for these three emotional moments: 1) Kurt messing up the last note during Defying Gravity, and then bravely finishing the song. 2) Kurt confessing to his dad that he purposely messed up so his dad wouldn't have to get any more horrible phone calls about his "f*g" son. 3) Sue Sylvester and her mentally disabled sister. Little Red Riding Hood. OMG. I want to cry right now as I type this.

This episode totally gave the middle finger to critics (including yours truly) who said "TV doesn't feature enough disabled people." Not only did Glee feature TWO actors with mental disabilities last night, it basically dedicated the rest of the episode to paraplegics. Well done, Glee. P.S. Can we make that wannabe cheerleader with Down syndrome (played by the adorable Lauren Potter) a permanent cast member? She was kind of awesome.

I also loved loved LOVED the music. So much so that this morning I YouTubed Proud Mary, Defying Gravity and Dancing With Myself. On repeat. Proud Mary was a fantastic way to end the episode, especially with everyone in wheelchairs. How can you not love a performance that shows everyone coming together like that?

Last but not least, Puck was in this episode. A lot. 'Nuff said.

*I didn't make this up. It is a true story about my fiancé's friend. Here is the full account, penned by the fiancé himself:

The guy had the turkey frozen and didn't think to thaw it until he was getting ready to cook it. He realized he needed to thaw it quickly and put it in a garbage bag in a tub full of hot water. The neck, heart, and other stuff in the middle stayed frozen though and had to be pulled out still frozen to speed up the thawing. In the end the turkey was a little undercooked and he used the fat and grease that came off the turkey as gravy and put it in an unlabeled jar. The fat and liquid separated into two layers, both unappetizing shades of brown.