A show I absolutely love but have never written about in oh, two plus months of blogging is Desperate Housewives.
I watched the most recent episode yesterday afternoon, thinking for the thousandth time what a terrific and funny show this is. Six seasons in, and DH shows no sign of stopping. It's as creative, entertaining, and sharply funny as ever.
I read all the TV blogs and websites out there, and what I've been finding is many of these bloggers/reviewers have been drinking the haterade. They hate Teri Hatcher/Susan. They don't like Dana Delany's character turning nutso. They think Susan's daughter Julie is dull. And on and on. What I want to know is, if you hate this show so much, why are you talking about it? (I guess for the same reason I wrote two blogposts about V. Hah.)
I'll admit, I'm skeptical at the start of every season. They keep introducing new neighbors. I'm of the "If it ain't broke, don't fix it" school of thought. The first time, they added a black family. Everyone was all, There's finally a black family on this show! Wow!! And then it turned out viewers didn't like them, so out they went. A couple of seasons later, they introduced Dana Delany. I wasn't so sure about her at first, but she's become a part of the show in a huge way and I love her. Then they said, Let's add a gay couple. The gay couple is just aiiight. Then they said, Let's add an Italian woman and her nutjob husband and son. Now I'm finding that I love love Drea de Matteo. I never saw a second of her in The Sopranos, didn't have any idea what she was like. Boy, am I pleasantly surprised. She's tough as nails, but she's got a big heart. And she's so, so funny. She is the healthy dose of Brooklyn to the cracked-out suburbia that is Wisteria Lane. What a great addition to the show.
So what I'm saying is, despite all the criticism out there, Desperate Housewives remains one of the funniest and most entertaining shows out there. It's a pleasure to watch every week (okay, every time I go on hulu.com).
So props to you, Marc Cherry. Props to you.
Friday, November 27, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
A Very Dexter Thanksgiving.
There are certain things you expect going into an episode of Dexter. You know Dexter will kill someone. You know Deb will swear a lot. You know Masuka will say something really dirty-sounding and it's supposed to be all the funnier because he's a short, bald Asian man (sigh).
This being the fourth season of Dexter, I'm used to all those things. They are part of the show's charm. And this Sunday's episode, being a Thanksgiving-themed one, I expected maybe a little human slice 'n dice before turkey slice 'n dice. Nothing more, nothing less.
Um. I was really, really wrong.
The episode. was. INSANE.
That's really the only word I can think of to describe it. So many crazy things happened--especially in the last ten minutes. At various points, my hands were over my ears, over my mouth, over my eyes. Here, in a nutshell, is what happened on this very Dexter Thanksgiving:
1) John Lithgow, aka the Trinity Killer, is watching football with his son. At one point, someone scores a touchdown. John Lithgow high-fives his son, then turns the high-five into a hand grip, then proceeds to BREAK HIS SON'S THUMB ON PURPOSE. Son bites his fist and tries not to make a sound so his mother and sister don't hear. Truly one of the most agonizing scenes I've ever seen on television. And that includes the trailer for Old Dogs.
2) During the meal, John Lithgow makes everyone say what they're thankful for. Nobody says they're thankful for John Lithgow. So he starts yelling at his son, and when his wife steps in, he yells at his wife and calls her a not very nice name that begins with a c. I have never heard that word on TV before. Oh my delicate, non-cable-subscribing ears.
3) Having had enough of his dad, John Lithgow's son gets up and says THIS IS ALL A LIE, THIS LIFE, THIS FAMILY. YOU'RE A KILLER, DAD! and proceeds to smash John Lithgow's urn (which contains the ashes of his dead sister) to the floor. John Lithgow starts to strangle him. Dexter takes his belt and starts strangling John Lithgow. He drags John Lithgow to the kitchen and takes a giant knife and is about to kill him when the wife comes in and starts screaming. Dexter runs out of the house. He gets in his car and drives home, all the while talking to his dead father's ghost.
4) By the way, while Dexter was out, Rita was kissed by the neighbor, whose name is Elliot. Thanks, writers, I really liked that name for one of my future sons, and now it's tainted.
5) Masuka threw his chocolate love cakes into the garbage. This made me sad. Writers, can we please get Masuka a girlfriend?
6) Quinn's girlfriend Christine, the journalist, answers a knock on her door. It's John Lithgow. I think he's going to kill her for writing about the Trinity Killer in the paper. Instead of her going, "Who the heck are you?" and him bludgeoning her to death, she goes, "Hi Dad." End episode.
Hollllllly crap! We found out last week Deb was shot by somebody Masuka's height, so it couldn't have been Trinity. Now it's clear: Christine the journalist did it, probably because her dad Trinity told her to. So not only is she desperate and clingy and annoying, she's also inherited the psycho gene. Ahhh.
Dexter, you have officially lifted the curse of the Holiday Episode. This is one that can be watched again and again (and by watched I mean with my hands over my eyes) no matter what time of year it is. It is that good.
Happy Thanksgiving, readers! And if you're having dinner with John Lithgow, remember to tell him you're thankful for him.
This being the fourth season of Dexter, I'm used to all those things. They are part of the show's charm. And this Sunday's episode, being a Thanksgiving-themed one, I expected maybe a little human slice 'n dice before turkey slice 'n dice. Nothing more, nothing less.
Um. I was really, really wrong.
The episode. was. INSANE.
That's really the only word I can think of to describe it. So many crazy things happened--especially in the last ten minutes. At various points, my hands were over my ears, over my mouth, over my eyes. Here, in a nutshell, is what happened on this very Dexter Thanksgiving:
1) John Lithgow, aka the Trinity Killer, is watching football with his son. At one point, someone scores a touchdown. John Lithgow high-fives his son, then turns the high-five into a hand grip, then proceeds to BREAK HIS SON'S THUMB ON PURPOSE. Son bites his fist and tries not to make a sound so his mother and sister don't hear. Truly one of the most agonizing scenes I've ever seen on television. And that includes the trailer for Old Dogs.
2) During the meal, John Lithgow makes everyone say what they're thankful for. Nobody says they're thankful for John Lithgow. So he starts yelling at his son, and when his wife steps in, he yells at his wife and calls her a not very nice name that begins with a c. I have never heard that word on TV before. Oh my delicate, non-cable-subscribing ears.
3) Having had enough of his dad, John Lithgow's son gets up and says THIS IS ALL A LIE, THIS LIFE, THIS FAMILY. YOU'RE A KILLER, DAD! and proceeds to smash John Lithgow's urn (which contains the ashes of his dead sister) to the floor. John Lithgow starts to strangle him. Dexter takes his belt and starts strangling John Lithgow. He drags John Lithgow to the kitchen and takes a giant knife and is about to kill him when the wife comes in and starts screaming. Dexter runs out of the house. He gets in his car and drives home, all the while talking to his dead father's ghost.
4) By the way, while Dexter was out, Rita was kissed by the neighbor, whose name is Elliot. Thanks, writers, I really liked that name for one of my future sons, and now it's tainted.
5) Masuka threw his chocolate love cakes into the garbage. This made me sad. Writers, can we please get Masuka a girlfriend?
6) Quinn's girlfriend Christine, the journalist, answers a knock on her door. It's John Lithgow. I think he's going to kill her for writing about the Trinity Killer in the paper. Instead of her going, "Who the heck are you?" and him bludgeoning her to death, she goes, "Hi Dad." End episode.
Hollllllly crap! We found out last week Deb was shot by somebody Masuka's height, so it couldn't have been Trinity. Now it's clear: Christine the journalist did it, probably because her dad Trinity told her to. So not only is she desperate and clingy and annoying, she's also inherited the psycho gene. Ahhh.
Dexter, you have officially lifted the curse of the Holiday Episode. This is one that can be watched again and again (and by watched I mean with my hands over my eyes) no matter what time of year it is. It is that good.
Happy Thanksgiving, readers! And if you're having dinner with John Lithgow, remember to tell him you're thankful for him.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Glee: A Crazy Long Hiatus and a Great New Time Slot.
After mid-December, Glee's not returning until April 13. April!!! 13!!! Are you kidding me?!?!
Also, it's moving to Tuesdays at 9PM following American Idol. My thoughts? Mixed.
The good: It'll get a HUGE and extremely compatible lead-in audience.
The bad: Glee will be competing against Lost.
The good: Does anybody watch Lost anymore?
The good: I currently got nothin' on Tuesdays at 9PM, and three conflicting shows on Wednesdays at 9PM. This helps.
The bad: ...I can't think of anything else. Good job, Fox!
Overall, it's a positive move. If only it didn't. start. April. 13!!!!!!!
Also, it's moving to Tuesdays at 9PM following American Idol. My thoughts? Mixed.
The good: It'll get a HUGE and extremely compatible lead-in audience.
The bad: Glee will be competing against Lost.
The good: Does anybody watch Lost anymore?
The good: I currently got nothin' on Tuesdays at 9PM, and three conflicting shows on Wednesdays at 9PM. This helps.
The bad: ...I can't think of anything else. Good job, Fox!
Overall, it's a positive move. If only it didn't. start. April. 13!!!!!!!
Curb Your Enthusiasm: A Headache, But a Funny One.
I used to hate Curb Your Enthusiasm.
Mostly because of its star, Larry David. He has got to be the most annoying guy on earth. Seriously. He walks around dressed like a casual schlub and his TV wife, played by Cheryl Hines, is young and gorgeous. Larry is everything I hate about sitcoms like According to Jim and The King of Queens, which features old/bald/overweight/neurotic husbands paired with young/attractive/skinny/sensible wives.
And yet, this season of Curb is surprisingly good. I can (almost) look past Cheryl Hines' attraction to Larry. I'm eh about the Seinfeld reunion plotline, because truthfully, those parts aren't what I find funniest. For example, two episodes ago, JB Smoove's character (who's black) pretends to be an adopted Jewish guy with some weird disease that Michael Richards thinks he has. JB goes to counsel Michael, telling him everything will be OK, he just needs to wear a certain kind of hat that'll keep him alive. When Michael finds out JB was lying, he finds JB in the crowded parking lot and starts screaming at him. Everyone around them holds up their cell phones to take video. I'm glad Michael Richards can poke fun at himself for that whole n-word debacle now.
There was also a great episode with Larry pretending to wear women's underwear to help out his friend Jeff, whose wife thinks he's cheating on him. No, they did not address why "Larry" would store "his" panties in Jeff's glovebox, but whatever. It was still funny.
The thing you have to watch out for with Curb is the giant headache waiting for you at the end of the episode. I'm even getting a headache typing this. Basically, there is a LOT of yelling about really stupid stuff. Everybody manages to start a really dumb argument about really dumb things with everybody else in every scene. I'm not kidding. These arguments go on and on and on and the only thing that ends them is the music signifying a transition to another scene. Which of course includes yet another screaming argument. By the end of the episode, you want to lie down with a cool compress on your forehead.
The fiance, of course, loves this show. He doesn't mind the husband/wife double standard I described earlier. I think he likes the idea that if he ever gets old/bald/schlubby, that there is a chance I will stay with him because Cheryl Hines stayed with Larry. Although it is weird he likes a show about arguing over stupid stuff when he and I basically do that 24/7. (We have a thing about how to change the channel on the remote control. I tell him to just hit the channel number we want but he likes hitting the +/- until he gets to it. Arrgh! I'm getting aggravated just thinking about it.)
Anywho, the nice things about Curb are a) the episodes are only a half-hour long, and b) the seasons are short. I like my headaches in small doses.
Mostly because of its star, Larry David. He has got to be the most annoying guy on earth. Seriously. He walks around dressed like a casual schlub and his TV wife, played by Cheryl Hines, is young and gorgeous. Larry is everything I hate about sitcoms like According to Jim and The King of Queens, which features old/bald/overweight/neurotic husbands paired with young/attractive/skinny/sensible wives.
And yet, this season of Curb is surprisingly good. I can (almost) look past Cheryl Hines' attraction to Larry. I'm eh about the Seinfeld reunion plotline, because truthfully, those parts aren't what I find funniest. For example, two episodes ago, JB Smoove's character (who's black) pretends to be an adopted Jewish guy with some weird disease that Michael Richards thinks he has. JB goes to counsel Michael, telling him everything will be OK, he just needs to wear a certain kind of hat that'll keep him alive. When Michael finds out JB was lying, he finds JB in the crowded parking lot and starts screaming at him. Everyone around them holds up their cell phones to take video. I'm glad Michael Richards can poke fun at himself for that whole n-word debacle now.
There was also a great episode with Larry pretending to wear women's underwear to help out his friend Jeff, whose wife thinks he's cheating on him. No, they did not address why "Larry" would store "his" panties in Jeff's glovebox, but whatever. It was still funny.
The thing you have to watch out for with Curb is the giant headache waiting for you at the end of the episode. I'm even getting a headache typing this. Basically, there is a LOT of yelling about really stupid stuff. Everybody manages to start a really dumb argument about really dumb things with everybody else in every scene. I'm not kidding. These arguments go on and on and on and the only thing that ends them is the music signifying a transition to another scene. Which of course includes yet another screaming argument. By the end of the episode, you want to lie down with a cool compress on your forehead.
The fiance, of course, loves this show. He doesn't mind the husband/wife double standard I described earlier. I think he likes the idea that if he ever gets old/bald/schlubby, that there is a chance I will stay with him because Cheryl Hines stayed with Larry. Although it is weird he likes a show about arguing over stupid stuff when he and I basically do that 24/7. (We have a thing about how to change the channel on the remote control. I tell him to just hit the channel number we want but he likes hitting the +/- until he gets to it. Arrgh! I'm getting aggravated just thinking about it.)
Anywho, the nice things about Curb are a) the episodes are only a half-hour long, and b) the seasons are short. I like my headaches in small doses.
Monday, November 23, 2009
The Amazing Race: Who to Root For?
Every time The Amazing Race begins a new season, I can pick out a favorite team and root for them up until they get booted. I suspect most fans do this as well. And usually I'm pretty good at rooting for winning teams. I rooted for the two winning hippie teams in the past couple of seasons (I forget their names, but one was an all-guy hippie team and one was an adorable male-female couple). I also rooted for Joyce & Uchenna, who also came out winners. They remain one of my favorite couples ever to compete on TAR. And of course, last season, I cheered on Tammy & Victor to the finish line. Yay!
This season, it was considerably harder to pick a favorite. I initially wanted to root for my Asian sistah Maria and her teammate Tiffany, but not only did they turn out to be big fat LIARS, but Maria was totally weak. Way to represent, Maria. I also thought I'd like the Harlem Globetrotters, because how can you not love a couple of big funny lugs with good spirits? But then the challenges looked too easy for them and I didn't like their smack-talk--it just rubbed me the wrong way. I also liked the gay brothers, except they also turned out to be not very nice people all of the time.
So my "favorite" team changed with each episode. In the episode where the old couple became my favorite...they got booted. The pink-haired guy and his dad became my favorite...until a few episodes later when they got booted.
Now I'm left with four teams, none of whom I really want to win. There's the gay brothers, who ganked a taxi from another team--NOT COOL. There's the Globetrotters, who I already talked about. There's the interracial couple, which includes a really annoying pageant queen who cannot count bells. Finally, there's the blond team, which another blog has dubbed Team Master Race (LOL), for whom things come easily because they are both young and fit and athletic. After last night's episode, I've decided Cheyne's a tool and therefore must not win. (Sorry, Cheyne's girlfriend--you seem like a nice person.) By the least of all evils rule, I guess I should root for the Globetrotters.
This has got to be the least likeable final four teams of Amazing Race history. Now, I didn't watch the first three seasons, so I could be wrong. But eck! Fans deserve better.
Also, can we not spend 500 episodes in a row in Europe next time? Sorry, but the scenery isn't that exciting. And the locals all speak English, which makes it too easy for the teams.
Amazing Race, you better bring it next season, because this one just ain't cutting it.
This season, it was considerably harder to pick a favorite. I initially wanted to root for my Asian sistah Maria and her teammate Tiffany, but not only did they turn out to be big fat LIARS, but Maria was totally weak. Way to represent, Maria. I also thought I'd like the Harlem Globetrotters, because how can you not love a couple of big funny lugs with good spirits? But then the challenges looked too easy for them and I didn't like their smack-talk--it just rubbed me the wrong way. I also liked the gay brothers, except they also turned out to be not very nice people all of the time.
So my "favorite" team changed with each episode. In the episode where the old couple became my favorite...they got booted. The pink-haired guy and his dad became my favorite...until a few episodes later when they got booted.
Now I'm left with four teams, none of whom I really want to win. There's the gay brothers, who ganked a taxi from another team--NOT COOL. There's the Globetrotters, who I already talked about. There's the interracial couple, which includes a really annoying pageant queen who cannot count bells. Finally, there's the blond team, which another blog has dubbed Team Master Race (LOL), for whom things come easily because they are both young and fit and athletic. After last night's episode, I've decided Cheyne's a tool and therefore must not win. (Sorry, Cheyne's girlfriend--you seem like a nice person.) By the least of all evils rule, I guess I should root for the Globetrotters.
This has got to be the least likeable final four teams of Amazing Race history. Now, I didn't watch the first three seasons, so I could be wrong. But eck! Fans deserve better.
Also, can we not spend 500 episodes in a row in Europe next time? Sorry, but the scenery isn't that exciting. And the locals all speak English, which makes it too easy for the teams.
Amazing Race, you better bring it next season, because this one just ain't cutting it.
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Grey's Anatomy: No Crowen For Me!
On the show Grey's Anatomy, there is a couple named Cristina and Owen. Some in the media/fanbase have dubbed them Crowen. I would like to dub them BrokenUp.
I never liked them as a couple. Their chemistry is all wrong. Their passionate embraces do not ring true. Crowen's scenes together look like that acting class you took in high school where you pretended to have feelings for the school urchin.
Now, this may be because I really don't like Owen. I don't think he's good-looking. (That, by the way, is why he doesn't get a "Mc" nickname.) He's just not hot. Also, he tried to choke Cristina in his sleep. Granted, he has PTSD, and he served our country, and he's basically a saint. But. I just can't get over his nearly killing her. Cristina may be able to forgive, but I can't forget.
As if these weren't enough reasons for me to dislike Crowen as a couple, Grey's gave us ANOTHER reason last night: He came THISCLOSE to kissing Teddy.
Ugh.
Look, I don't love Teddy, and I don't love Owen. But the two of them should not be together, at least not while Owen's still with Cristina. I don't know about you, but I think Cristina deserves a better love life than she's been getting for the past six seasons. First, they gave her this arrogant doctor who was played by a homophobic actor. Wait, I should concentrate on the character, not the actor? Okay, they gave Cristina this arrogant doctor who made Cristina cover up for his shaky hands, thereby endangering the lives of every patient who came under his knife. Now she has an unattractive redhead who choked her in his sleep and admitted to his female friend that he is/was in love with her all along.*
Cristina, you deserve better.
How about that hot biracial doc who's been following you around like a puppy since the merger? Jackson, his name is (thank you, IMDB). You know, the one with the very nice green eyes. He's got Mc written all over him. And he is already in love with you! You wouldn't have to work for it. Also, when he kissed you at that party? Chemistry up the wazoo.
So what say you, Grey's writers? Can we please get off the Crowen train (with Cristina dumping Owen and not the other way around) and get on the Crackson Express?
*Yes, Owen did eventually tell Teddy "But I'm in love with Cristina." So what? He shouldn't have said ANYTHING to Teddy. It was none of her beeswax.
I never liked them as a couple. Their chemistry is all wrong. Their passionate embraces do not ring true. Crowen's scenes together look like that acting class you took in high school where you pretended to have feelings for the school urchin.
Now, this may be because I really don't like Owen. I don't think he's good-looking. (That, by the way, is why he doesn't get a "Mc" nickname.) He's just not hot. Also, he tried to choke Cristina in his sleep. Granted, he has PTSD, and he served our country, and he's basically a saint. But. I just can't get over his nearly killing her. Cristina may be able to forgive, but I can't forget.
As if these weren't enough reasons for me to dislike Crowen as a couple, Grey's gave us ANOTHER reason last night: He came THISCLOSE to kissing Teddy.
Ugh.
Look, I don't love Teddy, and I don't love Owen. But the two of them should not be together, at least not while Owen's still with Cristina. I don't know about you, but I think Cristina deserves a better love life than she's been getting for the past six seasons. First, they gave her this arrogant doctor who was played by a homophobic actor. Wait, I should concentrate on the character, not the actor? Okay, they gave Cristina this arrogant doctor who made Cristina cover up for his shaky hands, thereby endangering the lives of every patient who came under his knife. Now she has an unattractive redhead who choked her in his sleep and admitted to his female friend that he is/was in love with her all along.*
Cristina, you deserve better.
How about that hot biracial doc who's been following you around like a puppy since the merger? Jackson, his name is (thank you, IMDB). You know, the one with the very nice green eyes. He's got Mc written all over him. And he is already in love with you! You wouldn't have to work for it. Also, when he kissed you at that party? Chemistry up the wazoo.
So what say you, Grey's writers? Can we please get off the Crowen train (with Cristina dumping Owen and not the other way around) and get on the Crackson Express?
*Yes, Owen did eventually tell Teddy "But I'm in love with Cristina." So what? He shouldn't have said ANYTHING to Teddy. It was none of her beeswax.
Friday, November 20, 2009
Survivor: Samoa: Just Declare Russell the Winner Already.
I wasn't before, but I'm cheering for you now, Russell.
When you found your first hidden immunity idol without help of a clue, I thought, pretty ingenious.
When you found the idol AGAIN with no help, I thought, wow.
When you found it a third time, AFTER half your tribe got to see video of the idol being hidden, and AFTER you were chased through the jungle because everyone knew you'd sniff it out, I thought, you know what? You deserve the million dollars.
I don't give a flying crap how you played the game dirty, burning someone's sock while they slept or letting a chicken loose in the middle of the night. I don't care that you lied about being in Hurricane Katrina (morally repugnant that may be). I don't even care that I want to have John the Rocket Scientist's babies. But you, you have done what no one else in the history of Survivor has done, and you have done it twice.
Hats off to you.
When you found your first hidden immunity idol without help of a clue, I thought, pretty ingenious.
When you found the idol AGAIN with no help, I thought, wow.
When you found it a third time, AFTER half your tribe got to see video of the idol being hidden, and AFTER you were chased through the jungle because everyone knew you'd sniff it out, I thought, you know what? You deserve the million dollars.
I don't give a flying crap how you played the game dirty, burning someone's sock while they slept or letting a chicken loose in the middle of the night. I don't care that you lied about being in Hurricane Katrina (morally repugnant that may be). I don't even care that I want to have John the Rocket Scientist's babies. But you, you have done what no one else in the history of Survivor has done, and you have done it twice.
Hats off to you.
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