Vancouver Olympics Opening Ceremony: Putting The "Eh" in "Eh?"

I haven't heard anyone say this, so perhaps this puts me in the severe minority.

But that Vancouver Olympics Opening Ceremony was the most boring thing I've ever seen.

Seriously. Boring.

I don't mean to offend anybody, least of all the First Nations of Canada. I'm glad they were honored and their history was told in the most-watched event of the world.

I just didn't want to see TWO HOURS of it. I felt like I was watching a moving exhibit at the Canadian Museum of Nature.

Remember a year and a half ago, Summer 2008, when Beijing stunned the world with the choreographed drumming, the moving scrolls, the rising and falling boxes operated by (surprise!) people underneath? I remember it well. Because I turned off the Vancouver Opening Ceremony somewhere in the middle of Sarah McLachlan playing piano while dancers frolicked in the two-dimensional forest background (zzzzzz) to rewatch the Beijing one on YouTube. Even on a two-by-four-inch video screen, the Beijing ceremony takes your breath away.

My fiance would like to point out here that what I am writing is "so cruel" and that "not every country has slave labor!" True. But let's call a spade a spade, or rather, a snoozy ceremony a snoozy ceremony.

My fiance would also like to point out that the Vancouver ceremony cost one-tenth of Beijing's ($30 million to $300 million). Well, it's the biggest worldwide event, and you only get to host it every so often (or never), so you may as well make the most of it.

Look, Vancouver's ceremony wasn't all boring. I really liked the first minute, with the guy snowboarding down the mountain and through the Olympic rings. That was really cool. I also liked seeing all the athletes walk out (as I do every Olympics), and I got a tear in my eye when the audience gave a standing ovation to the Georgian athletes because of one of their own had died earlier that day.

But yeah. The ceremony could've, should've been better. London, you better bring it in 2012.